Pondering

Let me ask you a question.  Let's say that you are home making dinner and watching TV and waiting for company to arrive for dinner.  Your phone...which is *usually* attached to you...which most people know...is in the other room.  But you're cooking dinner and anticipating the company that will soon arrive and you miss a phone call or a text saying that someone completely different than your company is planning on stopping by...and then they just show up.  On your doorstep.  Or they *say* they tried to call you but your phone shows no record of a missed call.  Does it matter who that somebody is? 

Would it bother you if it was your parents or other family?  Possibly.  If your parents/family are annoying and intrusive. 

Would it bother you if it was your best friend from out of town?  Possibly.  If your best friend knew your expected company and they didn't get along. 

Would it bother you if it was a local friend?  Possibly.  If you were running around nekkid cooking dinner and trying to get ready for your company. 

Would it bother you if it was your child?  Possibly.  If they were supposed to be somewhere else instead of walking through your front door. 

Would it bother you if it was someone you had no desire to see and no reason to see and knew you felt that way? 

Before I answer, let me say that I love company.  Absolutely love it.  Usually I don't mind if it's spur of the moment.  The only time I sorta mind is if I'm on my way out or have something planned (like a workout) and then the people-pleaser in me has trouble telling them I'm busy because I might offend...and I don't ever want to offend friends or family that I enjoy spending time with. 

The answer to that final question is yes.  Most definitely yes.  Why would someone who knows you don't want to see them and have no reason to see make a point to try and make contact? 

One answer.  To try and intimidate and control and make you feel unsecure. 

That's my perception.  So if you fall into any of the above categories except the last one, why don't you just make a point of making two-way contact with the person you hope to see and set a time that is convenient to both of you?  I love company.  I love to sit on my couch and chat and enjoy a beverage and catch up.  Or, hell, even meet your somewhere. 

If you fall into the final category, you better understand that I am not a pushover anymore.  To people who try to manipulate a situation?  I will shun you.  I will do all I can to keep you away from me.   Because my home is my sanctuary.  It is my safe place and,  I will protect my safe place at all costs.  I will protect myself and my family at all costs.  So make your choices wisely.  Because there are consequences to *your* actions.